SHE CAN HIDE BUT SHE CAN’T RUN – NOT BEFORE AND PROBABLY NOT AFTER
Girls afraid of the wedding night may want to remember that all our ancestral mums went through the same ordeal any many appear to have survived to fight another day for things far more important.
If you are afraid he may be disappointed, he may be scared stiff this strangest of all tools may malfunction and disappoint both of you, all the family and friends and shame the humanity of men around the world until Kingdom come.
We only thought about this post when we read a post from an Arab girl with some experience telling her sisters not to worry too much because the man may be worried about the first night even more. She provided no interesting details.
There is a great deal of rubbish in the West about virginity written mostly by men with silly questions like: “Are there virgins left out there?” It appears there are, and more than some men would like to think. Girls who slept with their boyfriends have complained that since they had their first encounter, the boy wants to do nothing else. Even an ice cream had to be licked from a flat position.
Still, in the West it is a private matter, more or less, but not in most Eastern societies. In many Arab countries girls are still murdered by relatives for losing their virginity and the pressures to remain virgins are considerable.
In some cases, mothers of the brides would be waiting outside the bedroom to get the proof of blood spillage to show relatives their daughters were chaste. We have many friends who slept with their girlfriends before marriage and most of them are still together. In a few cases, the parents of girls with lost virginity may offer the groom to be significant discount on the dowry which usually goes to the girl who may use it to buy things for herself or her flat.
Some daring Arab girls who slept with their boyfriends, or what have you, appear to have regretted the decisions and they are flocking to London by the plane load to freshen it up. Here is more on the subject of virginity:
And here is a story about a Lebanese girl who blinked at her boyfriend’s flat and woke up to find herself virginless and thought “never in the history of womanhood virginity was sacrificed so cheaply.”
If summing up is required, it is not as strict as it used to be say 50 years ago but it all depends on the families and regions.
In Akkadian, there are a number of words to denote virgins or inexperienced girls such as:
1- ardatu: young woman, maiden, maid, virgin, lass;
2- batultu, batussu: [Human → Body] an adolescent girl, a nubile girl, a teenage girl, a young maid, a virgin (?);
3- batūssu: a girl, a maid, a virgin;
4- lā lamdu: [Moral life → Conscience] 1): without experience, inexperienced; virgin;
5- lummudu: [Education] 1): word: taught; 2);
6- unīqu: [Animals] young she-goat, a kid [religion]: [unīqu lā petītu]: a virgin kid;
7- wardatu: a girl, a young woman, a maid / a virgin.
The fact there are a number of words that mean or could mean “virgin” is significant in itself because they prove virginity was important. However, not all the words literary mean “virgin”. The first one is famous since it is the origin of “Eros, erotic and erotology”. The root is *ʼR. It is a category so it is all inclusive of private parts and the joint life of man and woman.
The other part of the linguistic cluster is the reversed *Rʼ “see” (*Rʼa). What has ‘seeing’ to do with sex and man-woman partnership? They have to see each other before anything can happen. This cluster is logical – boys and girls saw each other, met, fell in love and got together.
Word no 7 (wardatu) is from the same root but the linguistic structure is different: w+*ʼR. This is a beautiful word and it means “rose”. So, there you have it, a “rose” is not a metaphor for a girl but the name of a girl herself. The name remains today one of the most popular in the Arab world although it is several thousand years ago as a trilateral and probably 40,000 years + as a root because love, sex, marriage, children and home-making is a second-generation linguistic invention, the first includes words connected with life, like water, food, etc.
The root of the two nouns in no 2 and 3 is the same but we are surprised to find it with a ‘b’ rather than ‘p’, so it is possible it was migrated during the Amorite era, or Babylonian rather than Assyrian era. ‘*PT’ is “to sever, stop, cease, abstain, cut something from the root”. It simply means a girl who is severed from sex. Mary, Jesus mum, is called “Mary the batul”, i.e. “the one who abstains from sex”.
Words 4 and 5 do not mean “inexperienced” but literary “untaught” as a girl may have an encyclopedic knowledge of sex but can’t write her name. It is from the same root as ‘talmīdu’ “school boy, pupil, student, disciple.”
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